Bill Sykes' Newsletter
from America.
(December 2004)
An ex-Brit gives his views-(without fear
or favor)---of the American Scene
A
little corny old folks humour: (Courtesy of Joe in
southern California),
 A very well dressed elderly Gentleman, (mid-nineties),
walks into an upscale cocktail lounge and surveys the
scene.
His eyes focus on a youngish looking eighty year old lady sitting at the bar
and so he sidles over and sits down beside her and orders a drink, he takes
a sip out of the glass and leans over and says, "Tell me my dear do I
come here often?"
Two elderly gentlemen, sitting under shade of an old
oak tree on a bench in the grounds of a retirement home,
and one turns to the other and says "Hi
Tom, I’m eighty three years old and I’m full of aches and pains,
I know you are about my age, so how do you feel?"
Tom turns around
slowly and says, "I feel like
a new born baby - Yep a new born baby - no hair,
no teeth, and I think that I’ve just wet my diaper."
 An elderly couple were having dinner at another elderly
couples house and after eating the two wives left the
table and went into the kitchen. The two gentlemen were
talking and one said to the other, "We went out to a
new restaurant last night and it was so good that I would
highly recommend it." The
other old fellow asked what was the name of the restaurant, and
the first gentleman thought for a moment and finally said, "What is the
name of flower that is usually red, has thorns, and you give to a loved one?"
The second one responded by saying, "You must mean
a rose." Yes that’s
right said the first gentleman walking towards the door of the kitchen, were
he hollered, "Hey Rose what’s the name of the restaurant we went
to last night?"
As the comedians are won’t to say - "Leave
them laughing as you go".
Oh dear, oh dear, how could I stoop so low - I’m really scraping the
bottom of the barrel when I repeat "Old Folk" jokes.
Sorry about that.
Disclaimer:
Some of the information
gathered for this newsletter is gleaned from American
and International media sources, (including the Internet),
and as such is quoted as accurately as possible. I try
to obtain confirmation on each subject from several outlets,
so the text is a mixture of composite news items and
personal comments and therefore the reader must make
his/her own judgement as to the reliability and degree
of accuracy of the subjects discussed.
Eric (Bill) Sykes. (California).
We welcome feedback about any of the contents of these
newsletters. Please send all correspondence to bill_sykes@huddersfield1.co.uk
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