LATEST NEWS FROM NETHERTON.
Bong Bong Bong.
This Is the NBC News.
Hello good evening and welcome. Tonight’s bulletin is titled…
Earth Tremors Felt In Down Town Netherton
Around the area of The Crescent, Earth tremors have been
occuring all day.
Our investigators have now got to the bottom of it.
A very young Mr N. had been at home with his mother.
He is said to have been peckish but knowing tea was about
to be put on the table he sneaked to the pantry and set about
the biscuits. There was only one kind of biscuit in the said
pantry.
Mr N. was far too young to take notice of the fact he was
consuming fig biscuits. It was the first time he’d tasted
these, oooo they tasted good. 1 turned into 2, 2 turned into
3 etc.
Mr N. had just finished the packet when mum called that tea
was about to be served. Mr N. was now not hungry and ate very
little, much to the annoyance of his mother.
The earth tremors began the following day.
Mr N. is said to have got up with “a right belly ache” and
promptly ran to the toilet.
Having well and truly spattered the bowl (or should I say
bowel), Mr N. crawled from the bathroom.
This continued for some 8 hours with 10 minute breaks between.
Neighbours were said to concerned about possible damage to
their property.
The bog is reported to have been shook from its mountings,
and teeth marks were apparent on the bottom of the bathroom
door.
Mr N s rectum is said to be in a bucket of ice. Doctors are
concerned for the amount of weight loss incurred.
Mr N. do you have any comment at this time?
“My poor cat flap needs a very soft cushion”
Thank you that was the News.
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