MEMORIES
November 2008
Memories are so important
Like bubbles of happiness
When you’re feeling sad
A memory floats like a bubble
Into the conscious mind
A fragment of the past
Some memories are happy
Sent to make you smile
Some memories are sad
Sent to relieve a heavy heart
And eyes full of tears
Some memories are confusing
Broken and not all there
But bring two people together
And the jigsaw pieces make a full picture, one to share
Memories are prescious
Sometimes lost and sometimes found
Ever present somewhere
Always so profound.
By Claire Wilde
BACK TO MYSELF
November 2008
The day always seems to start badly
Sometimes I’m gasping for breath
Struggling to hold on to reality
Fixating on darkness and death
But as the day wears on I feel confidence
Building up inside
I’m forever reaching for freedom
Even when trying to hide
I’m embarrassed and feel so lonely
Though surrounded by people who care
Not one of them truly understands
The hell that drives my despair
And yes it’s easy to hide away
To never face the day
But I don’t, I fight with every breath
So one day I can say
I’m finally free of this madness
That has taken over my life
One day I’ll make everyone happy
Be the perfect mother and wife
But for now all I need is patience
Which mine sometimes wears thin
I’m a fighter though, and I’ll carry on
So one day I’ll fit back in.
By Claire Wilde
ALL I CAN BE
July 2008
I’ve made it after all these years
Made some sense of my life
Worked hard every step of the way
Battled through the strife
Life’s been an uphill struggle
With sadness at every turn
But I’ve used all the sorrow and heartache
To reach my goal, to help me learn
I’ve done things I’m not proud of
But thank God they came good
I’ve struggled to cope, sometimes struggled to see
The miracles that I should
Like the miracle of life
Easy given and easy lost
So fragile and precious and beautiful too
Abused at what cost?
And the wonder of love that surrounds me
That should help me to be free
But sometimes stops me doing things
Stops me being me
But for now I’ve won one battle
And it feels bloody good
So I’ll toast my latest achievement
Like any victor would.
By Claire Wilde
MOTHERS PRIDE
July 2008
She would have been so proud of me
She saw the woman I could be
Saw potential in my eyes
Had no need to criticise
Watched me work and watched me rest
At my worst and at my best
Held my hand and urged me on
When I was right, when I was wrong
Then she left and I was alone
Worked my fingers to the bone
To show her I could achieve
Make her proud of who I could be
And now I’ve done it, I feel a calm
Like she’s holding me in her arms
And telling me ‘I told you so’
I’ll never let that feeling go.
By Claire Wilde
TOO SOON TO SAY GOODBYE
March 2008
The world has ended
For a brief second of my life
I’ve stopped breathing
I’m staring at the light
Then I come rushing back
Air fills my lungs at last
Terror turns to pure relief
I’m coming back fast
What happened to my consciousness?
What happened to the pain?
I’ve come back to the here and now
Though echoes of the past remain
I know I suffered greatly
Before this epiphany occurred
I lived my life sedately
The outside world was blurred
But now I long for freedom
A normal life at last
I won’t be scared of what may come
Of what’s already passed
I’ll walk among the living
Hold my head up high
Till one day, finally, the light will return
And I have to say goodbye.
By Claire Wilde
AUTUMN
(February 2008)
Autumn leaves swirl cyclonic to the floor
The chatter of birds reaches my ears no more
Vivid brown and red hues fill my vision
Animals hibernate in coalition
The temperature drops as winter draws near
While the clouds seem to weep a torrent of tears
Night falls sooner and a new school term starts
Birds migrate to warmer parts
And the promise of Christmas is just out of reach
Along with mince pies, mistletoe and the queens speech
So as we leave summer and salads and sun
We dance with the leaves now that autumn’s begun.
By Claire Wilde
WATCH OVER ME
(September 2007)
My angel are you watching us
Whilst sitting on your cloud
Dropping pearls of wisdom
Which we catch to make you proud
Are you listening when we talk to you
Mopping up our tears
Laughing at our anecdotes
The tales from through the years
Are you whispering your love for us
So we don’t feel alone
My angel are you watching us
From in the twilight zone
By Claire Wilde
Curiosity
(August 2007)
Curiouser and curiouser
I wish I could see in your head
I’m eager to travel where
Others fear to tread
From the outside you’re a simple man
No special wants or needs
An intelligent and well read man
A man easy to please
Then inside there’s a sad man
Overflowing with pain
Who’s fed up of the darkness
It’s driving him insane
Curiouser and curiouser
I wish I could understand
Kill the pain, stab the dark
Depression be damned
I vow to help you fight this thing
I want to see you smile
It may seem impossible, it probably is
But I’ll be there every step of the trial.
By Claire Wilde
GUARDIAN ANGEL
(August 2007)
Wrap me in your angel wings
Protect me from this cruel world
I hide away from evil things
Their blackened nails all curled
They reach for me, fingers like tree branches,
Gnarled and bent out of shape
They touch my skin, caress my cheek
Hold me trance-like, won’t let me escape
The soft beating of your heart brings me round
Refuses to let me go
Till I realise it’s my heart not yours that beats
And I’m swallowed up by woe
And the creatures that want to take me
Reach out once more with glee
But I promise I won’t let them take me
I’ll let my emotions free
I won’t be another statistic
I’m a survivor and I’ll fight to the end
I’ll keep my tears from drowning me
Allow my mind to mend
But I’ll never forget you my angel
My sanity won’t let you go
You’ll light up my darkness forever
Guard me from the evil below.
By Claire Wilde
